Chaucer's done it again

I'm a little late on this one, because I have to devote my full attention to the Chaucer posts in order to understand them :>, so I tend to put off reading them. But anyway!

Deedes of Majestee

Armor doth weare KYNG RICHARDE for proteccioun.

Oones as the cronique doth reherce, ther liued a kynge hight Darius who dide gather hys thre counsellors and aske what was the strengest thynge, wyn, womman, or a kyng? And the firste wyse man dide saye that the kynge was the moost of strengthe, for he hadde powir over lyf and deeth. And the seconde dide clayme that wyn was the strengest, for yt doth bynde everi man far moore than ony kynge. And the thridde sage dide saye that that wommen ben the myhtieste, for hir loue hath caused manye kingdomes to rise or to falle - and yet he dide adde that truthe was strenger than alle othir thynges, for in no wise may truthe be overcome. And then KYNG RICHARDE dide slaye alle of them.

KYNG RICHARDE doth nat sleepe; he exerteth his majestee while prone.

KYNG RICHARDE kan yive a summarie of Pieres Plowman yn undir a minute.

Whanne Parlemente dide aske for an accounte of the expenditure of KYNG RICHARDE his housholde, KYNG RICHARDE sente vnto them onlye a peynture of his visage ytwistede yn wrathe. Parlemente dissoluede ytselfe and the Knightes of the Shire dide flee to foreyn londes.

And these aren't necessarily the best ones. Go.

(I wonder if KYNG RICHARDE can do a roundhouse kick?)