Dream-Chloe drives a Yaris

And not just any Yaris. A Yaris hatchback, the same exact color I'm going to buy.

It must be fate.

take my yaris...

I'm hoping mine will have rims rather than hubcaps, but you get the idea.

My impression of Augusta-area school systems

Oh no! There's a chill in the air!

Cancel school tomorrow!!

Badass

From Smallville 6.11, "Justice":

Green Arrow and Cyborg are the only ones with decent costumes. Aquaman's needs to ramp up a little, and Impulse (Flash) seems to just be wearing a hoodie. (And I don't think those hoods he and Arrow wear are very conducive to peripheral vision.)

But still. Badass!

I know the rumors are that Clark will never fly or wear the suit in this show, but I hope they're disinformation. Because it really needs to happen. Right now the excuse he gives for not joining Arrow's team to stop Lex is that he needs to stop the rest of the Zoners. That's all well and good...but what happens after that? Is he really going to go up against Lex as himself, with no disguise?

(If he does end up wearing the costume, will he start wearing glasses as Clark? And how in the world will Lex not recognize him? Maybe he will...that could be an interesting twist.)

Tough

When I said I was "built Ford tough", I was referring to the fact that I can generally "handle" anything. Going back and rereading that questionnaire in the past couple of years, I've scoffed at myself for thinking I was strong.

But I am strong in one way, and that's health-wise. Despite being obese (I'd like to call myself overweight, but that would unfortunately be inaccurate), I am able to function for the vast majority of any given year.

There are many people who get sick easily, or have terrible allergies or migraines or periods. I'm not one of them. When I have periods I have cramps, but they're mild enough to think of as "annoying". I've had a migraine occasionally, but they seem to only arise when I take in too much caffeine, so they're easy enough to avoid. Since moving to Augusta, I have had to deal with allergies, but it's only been crippling once or twice, and since then I've adjusted.

When I'm sick, it's rarely enough to put me out of commission. I won't be happy about it, but I'll still be able to work.

Monday was one of the few exceptions--I went home after lunch feeling horribly nauseated. As I was a bit run down when I woke up yesterday, I thought to call in, but ultimately I went to work and felt better and better as the day progressed.

Today I feel perfectly fine, with just a little nasal congestion to remind me that I was sick.

Then there was that whole cancer thing. I can give the doctors credit for kicking it out of my system after six months. But it never came back. And I never had graft vs. host disease.

And now, even after being annihilated by chemotherapy, my ovaries are still trying to function.

So I suppose that in a way, that questionnaire response wasn't a self-delusion.

Sigh

Sean had me Netflix Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for him. As soon as I brought it home from the mailbox, he pulled it up on his laptop.

Afterwards he handed me the disc and said, "Very good movie. I might watch it again here in a bit."

"Unfortunately, I've never used drugs, so I don't know if those scenes were accurate," he went on. "But I love his voice...his writing style."

I finished watching a supremely enjoyable episode of Detective Conan, and then I looked the infamous Mr. Thompson up on Wikipedia. I found out who he was two years ago, and I really had no inclination to research him further, but Sean's interest piqued my interest. Plus, I wanted to "prove" that Thompson did in fact die with his grandchild in the house and his wife on the phone.

Now I just feel tired.

My husband is a very intelligent man, and I don't doubt that Thompson's writing is interesting and funny. But I still balk at the idea of glorifying a man who lived and died the way he did.

I've never read a word the man wrote. Part of me feels like I should. Part of me really doesn't want to, feels that doing so would violate my core beliefs. And then the first part comes back and says, well, isn't life about paradigm shifts, learning, growing, accepting, changing, and coming back to yourself to find your core evolved and reaffirmed?

I don't know why the quest for knowledge can be so tiresome. But this isn't new. I've always found the idea of pursuing knowledge I don't want to care about tedious. Is this the point where the enlightened soul pushes on? What happens to the person who just closes the book?

Creativity...gone!

I've been trying to design a few things in the past few days, to no avail. Everything looks like crap.

Maybe it's because I'm (still) sick. But whatever it is, it needs to go away. I don't need the self esteem hit.

Brooke's bridal shower

I'm home sick, and I don't really feel up to writing a rundown of events, but I at least wanted to get the pictures up from Brooke's bridal shower yesterday. Mari and Brooke's sister-in-law Dorothy and I put it on at Mari's house. Since Brooke's moving to England and can't carry a bunch of stuff with her, we decided to do a scrapbook at the party and have guests bring in pictures. It was fun :)

Brooke's niece Allison is so cute :)

More photos here.

Super

You are Supergirl

Supergirl 92% Wonder Woman 92% Superman 85% Green Lantern 65% Spider-Man 60% Iron Man 55% Robin 49% Catwoman 45% Batman 35% The Flash 35% Hulk 30%

Lean, muscular and feminine. Honest and a defender of the innocent.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Cell phone fun

When I first got my phone, I changed the "Greeting", which is the first line of text on the LCD screen, to "Hi Heather!" It stayed like that for some time, until one day I decided to change it to "Kyou Kara Maou!"

This morning, in a haze of I-don't-want-to-get-up, I changed it again.

My phone now greets me with "Wakatta zo!"

This is one of the things Conan says when he's figured out a case. I considered the other main phrase, "Yometa zo!", but ultimately I decided to stick with a usage that people might recognize.

Too bad my phone can't do Japanese characters!

Who makes University Hospital's TV ads?

Because the Augusta Visitors and Convention Bureau needs to hire them. I mean, wow. The commercial they've got on TV now makes Augusta look awesome.

Gunner = squee!

So bishie!

:>

Re: Detective Conan 147

Takagi-keiji, you are so awesome.

And yet...so dense.

Kung fu truisms

The more you do, the more you are able to do.
The more you do it, the more you are able to do it.
The less you do, the less you are able to do.
The less you do it, the less you are able to do it.

That was one of several sayings I had to memorize for my kung fu class, and of all of them, it's the one I know I'll always remember, because it has always rung true to me.

Lately I have been working crazy overtime, but I've been committed to doing it, and I've thrived. I feel like if I could apply that commitment to other things--making dinner, exercising--I could accomplish so much. Once I get used to doing things, it's much easier for me to keep doing them.

It's just the getting started that's hard.

FlyLady says it takes a month to learn a new habit. I tend to stop practicing new habits after a week. Maybe if I could just hold out a little longer, I could maintain them.

For now, I'm happy to bask in the sheer amount of work I've accomplished in the past two weeks. It even spilled over to my second job!

Regardless, it was a good concert

I feel kind of dumb because I had a group of musicians sign a CD they apparently didn't perform on. But Sophie Milman did perform--of course--and I got her signature too (made out to me!), so I suppose it's okay.

(I should have bought Preface for Paul and Cameron to sign, at least. But I didn't, and I'm going to force myself to stop obsessing about it!)

Running scared

Last night, Sean told me he was unhappy to read over at the AMRN that I wouldn't be participating in the new game.

"Why would I play?" I said instantly and offhandedly. "I don't want to play. And besides, if I did play, I couldn't play with you."

Take notes, kids; this is the sort of thing you do not say to the person you love.

I fumbled through a lame explanation and Sean left the room. I don't know if he was upset or not, because our computers are in different rooms, so he's always leaving the room to get back to his game. But it finally occurred to me that I hadn't properly discussed the matter with him, and that I should do so as soon as possible.

When Sean and I started playing together on the AMRN, we had only been dating for a little over a year. And frankly, I didn't want the game to come between us. It was just a game. Sure, it was fun, but it wasn't worth arguing over.

So I did things. I compromised my opinions. I sold out my other friends in the game. I destroyed continuity. I refused to challenge Sean's authority, except for one notable instance in which I allowed him to smack my character down for it. Most of my protests were passive-aggressive, internalized, only emerging through the thoughts of one of my characters, and nothing came of them.

One of the best writers I ever had the pleasure of knowing quit the game while I was GMing it, and it's pretty obvious that it was because of my inability to stand up to Sean.

Of course, my submissive, Sean-promoting playing style didn't make Sean happy, either. Especially the time I used a highly powerful character to deus ex one of his characters out of his own death. It cheapened the scene, the characters, and the plot as a whole.

I don't want to go back to those days.

Sure, we'd only been together a year when I started playing, and I'm a different person now, and blah blah blah. But I kept up the same MO for my entire career at the AMRN. When I played with other people, I managed to (mostly) be objective and fair. When I played with Sean, I was too afraid to rock the boat to do anything memorable.

I'm afraid that if we tried it again, it would either result in the same thing, or it would adversely affect our relationship. Because to be honest, I often disagreed with Sean about the game. I was interested in drama and character development. He was interested in those things, too, but he wasn't willing to bend any rules for them. I don't want to spend my time being mad at Sean for going against some plot tangent I've devised, or for punishing my characters for being in character.

And I don't know enough about the rules of roleplaying systems or the technology of Macross to be able to do anything about it myself. I'm essentially at his mercy...which is another reason why I usually went along with whatever he said. After all, he knew better than me, right?

I don't want to enter a situation in which I'm at a disadvantage. I don't want to enter a situation that encourages me to behave the way I did before.

Yes, there are times when I feel a yearning to play again. But it's never been strong enough to overcome my fear.

Associations

Isn't it weird how certain things can repeatedly remind us of other things? For example, often when I cook, if not every time, I think of the movie The Boy Who Could Fly. I have no idea why.

Lately, whenever I move an email into my "Done" box (which I always create so I can have old emails as a reference), I think about the time a coworker was hunting for a picture that had been sent out to all the producers. Since I get those emails too, I said that it might still be in my email.

"No, it wouldn't still be in email," my coworker said.

That so annoyed me. How would she know what was in my email? Just because she has the habit of deleting everything doesn't mean I do.

And I guess since I didn't say anything to her, it still bothers me...especially when I'm working with my email :>

Pet Peeve: Return Receipts

I will respond to your email when I respond to your email. You don't need to know that I read your email immediately and then didn't respond immediately. And I don't need that kind of pressure!

Why I Love Brooke, Reason #91859672

If there is even the remotest possibility that a comma might be shoehorned into a sentence...Brooke will add three.

I'm dealing

I haven't had the time/inspiration to post something to bump the previous whiny post down below the fold, but I wanted to let you all know that I came back swinging. Well, flailing. But at least it's something.

Somehow, the things that need to get done are getting done, and that's what's important.

Not being the best should not equate soul-crushing defeat

And yet for me it does. It cripples me.

I subscribe to the "let's not make it look crappy" theory of design

Some people think that as long as it's on there, it's fine.

However, I will fiddle with it until it flows well with everything around it.

That's just me, I guess.

(Context? Ha!)

Creamy Old Bay Scallops

Tonight I had McDonald's for dinner because Sean was asleep when I got home. But last night and the night before, Sean and I cooked dinner together.

Yesterday was the best because he helped me the whole time. He measured things, stirred the pot, cooked the pasta, prepared the salads, and tidied up. It was so much fun having him in the kitchen, and it was very helpful to have an extra set of hands.

We made Creamy Old Bay Scallops, an Eating Well with Kim recipe. It was amazing. I wasn't sure what I'd think of it when I first read the recipe...but I'm very glad I tried it!

Here it is if you want to make it:

Creamy Old Bay Scallops

1 T canola oil
1 bunch green onions, chopped (about 1 1/4 C)
1/4 C chopped red pepper
1 lb. bay scallops (I found them frozen at Wal-Mart)
2 tsp Old Bay seasoning
1 1/2 T corn starch
1/8 tsp salt
1 C fat free half and half, divided
1 1/2 C frozen corn
1 (14 oz) can black beans (low sodium)

Put oil in a large non-stick skillet and place over medium heat. Saute the green onions, red pepper, scallops and Old Bay together for 3-4 minutes. Meanwhile combine the corn starch and 1/4 cup half and half. Add cornstarch mixture, remaining half and half, corn, black beans and salt to the pan. Bring mixture to a low boil and cook until sauce begins to thicken, stirring constantl. Garnish by sprinkling each plate with a little more Old Bay seasoning. Serve over pasta (spaghetti, linguini or egg noodles).

Yield: 4 servings (serving size: 1 1/4 cup)
Nutrient Breakdown: Calories 290, Fat 6g, Saturated Fat 1g, Cholesterol 45mg, Sodium 600mg, Carbohydrate 37g, Fiber 7g, Protein 26g
Nutrition Bonus: 10 percent DV Vitamin A, Calcium and Iron; 50 percent DV Vitamin C
Exchanges: 2 carbohydrates, 3 lean meats

Serving Suggestion: Whole wheat pasta, green salad with light dressing, sliced cantaloupe

There weren't any red peppers at the store, so I bought a yellow one, and it worked fine. Also, I forgot to add the scallops until the end, so we had to cook it longer ;P

We used whole grain fettucine that came in a gift basket Mom sent us awhile back. It worked perfectly. We also had a bag of romaine salad with little tomatoes cut up over it and Creamy Caesar dressing.

This recipe serves four. Sean and I halved it, and we'll be making it again next week with the leftover ingredients. :)

I need a recipe card holder!

Mom and Dad gave me a beautiful Kitchenaid mixer for Christmas. Here's a picture:

When I put it on the counter, I had to rearrange everything in the kitchen. I actually like it better in there now :) The bread machine and bread board are over next to the canisters, the candle holder that was there originally is between my utensil holders, and the cookbook stand is now next to the Kitchenaid.*

Then yesterday (that is, January 6), I went crazy and planned out dinner for this week. In doing so, I had to (of course) consult my recipes to see what I wanted to make. This reminded me that I still hadn't done anything with my recipes and cookbooks.

With the rearranging of the kitchen, it made sense to me to put my cookbooks and recipes in the cabinet above the sink, close to the mixer and the cookbook holder. So I did that, putting the plastic bowls that were there down beneath the counter, behind some crockery.

This gave me plenty of room for the cookbooks I've managed to acquire (mostly from Mom--thanks Mom!), and for now I have the recipe cards in a stack next to them. But I really need a nice box.

I liked the wooden box I had before, but I'd like to know what my options are before I make a final decision. Unfortunately, my cursory internet search has come up pretty dry...nothing's really caught my eye. Any suggestions?

* Note: There's also a lovely sushi set on top of the microwave now, replacing the crockery tea settings that came with my pink dishes. Thanks to Brooke and David for the beautiful gift!

Due to illness, I have not had a normal menstrual cycle. In 2003, I had my first natural period in five years. However, I didn't have one after that, so I consulted doctors.

The general assumption was that uteran lining had built up over those five years and finally come out. I sought the opinion of a specialist to see if this meant I might someday be fertile.

Under the specialist I took hormones off and on for two years. When I was on hormones, I would have periods normally--sometimes very strong ones. When I went off the hormones, I would usually have one more period, and then stop.

Recently the specialist I was working with retired, and I haven't sought help elsewhere. To be honest, it has been very tiring dealing with this issue, waiting for periods, thinking I might be pregnant, etc. I have been off hormones for at least four months. But a few days ago, I started spotting.

The spots were red and brown, and I continued having them through the next day. On the third day, a regular--though mild--period arrived. The blood was alternately brown and red. Then today, the fourth day, it seemed to be ending. I wore a pad just in case to a party, at which I went to the bathroom twice and found practically nothing when I wiped.

But after I got home, I discovered a sudden rush of bright red blood, including a mass of clots.

Now it seems to have subsided, but I don't know that the period is over just yet.

I had somewhat assumed that if I adopted a healthier lifestyle, my body would become strong and perhaps repair itself. However, this period has come at a time when I am overweight and sedentary, so I'm not sure what the catalyst was.

Generally, I have been feeling all right. For weeks now I have felt lethargic and uninterested in doing more than I had to to get through the day--I'd eat out rather than cook, watch TV rather than clean, drive rather than walk. But in the past few days I have felt very energetic. I have accomplished more in the past two days than I have in weeks.

I have tended in the past to get highly motivated on my period, so that may be the cause. However, I should also mention that at my mother's recommendation, I have started taking Vitamin B Complex. I first took it on Thursday.

I am also taking a multivitamin, calcium, and folic acid. I am not taking any medications, though in the past I have taken thyroid medicine and blood pressure medicine.

Today's weight: 241

Funny

The other day, someone at work asked me if I build the website "in PSP".

She meant to say "PHP" :> Although using a PlayStation Portable to build a website would be pretty interesting.

Still awake

I've been staying up late all week.

Saturday's going to be interesting. I have to do some freelance work--I'd love to skip it, but I've been skipping it for weeks now and it needs to get done. I also have to do some overtime at my job for that exciting project I mentioned before. After that, there's a goodbye party for a work colleague!

At my mom's suggestion, I started taking Vitamin B Complex today. Hopefully it'll help me have the energy to do everything.

I may end up working on one or both projects on Sunday, too. But what I really hope will happen on Sunday is a trip to the Canal. I have more and more clothes that don't look good on me anymore, and if I don't start being active again it'll happen to everything I own.

Woo, grouchy (TMI alert)

I'm irritable!

It's not a bad mood. I don't feel particularly down. I'm actually kind of excited about a project at work that's finally reaching fruition, and I'm looking forward to watching more Detective Conan, and I went to see Brooke's wedding dress fitting today and it was fun, and now I'm sitting comfortably in my chair at my computer reading.

But I'm having a period. You know how that goes.

The thing is, I haven't had one in quite a long time. I don't remember when the last one was, and I can't remember if I blogged it either. I do remember that it came some time after my last round of provera.

Not long after that, I ran out of estrace, and since I had no health insurance at the time, I didn't refill my prescriptions. My doctor called me to let me know she was leaving the practice, so I don't have an endocrinologist anymore anyway. I let all my prescriptions run out, and I haven't taken any of them since. I had a regular checkup scheduled, but again, due to lack of insurance, I cancelled it, and have never rescheduled.

All that was somewhere around September.

So I've been off hormones, off blood pressure meds, and off thyroid meds for something like three or four months.

For about a week and a half now something that not even I, the TMI Queen, wish to state plainly. I'll just say that it was consistent, which made it odd, because usually it's on and off.

Then the day before yesterday, I noticed what seemed to be spotting. I noticed it again yesterday. But nothing seemed to be coming of it.

This afternoon, though, the full period came to fruition. It seems to be a fairly light one. What interests me about it, though, is the color of the blood. All the periods I can remember having in recent years started out brown. This one is brown and red at the same time.

I don't know if that means anything.

Really, I'm just documenting this for myself, because I don't have a set structure for recording my medical information. I guess I should think about that, because it'd be handy to just pull out a little book or something whenever a nurse asks me those questions they always ask.

In any case, I'm bloated and grumpy, but otherwise, I feel okay.

Four years

That's right; this year I didn't forget!

I hate Bellsouth's "there's no reason" ad

When I see it, I want to fly into a murderous rage.

See, there's this young couple walking a downtown street. And the guy starts saying, "There's really no reason to stick to dialup."

Except he only manages to get out "There's really no re--"

And then his girlfriend stops walking, presses her hand against his chest, and, laughing, interrupts, "There's really no reason to stick to dialup." While she speaks, I swear she starts giving him a nipple twist.

The look on his face says, "Well, she castrated me again...but what can I do?"

Seriously. What is the purpose of this? Is this supposed to be cute? It's not cute. It's sickening. Why is it okay for her to cut her boyfriend off, and then say the exact same thing he was going to say? Why is it okay for him to put up with it?

For the rest of the commercial, the guy just stands there, looking cowed and not a little annoyed, and the girl keeps talking in her cutesy, giggly voice, ignoring him.

I just want to smack her in the face.

Why am I still awake?

Because I'm not tired, is the easy answer. But why is that?

I sort of feel like I'm standing on a precipice, looking out on something below. It seems so close I can almost touch it, but in reality I have to jump off the edge to even get near. And, of course, risk dying.

I also feel stupid for having such cliche feelings!

Moral of many an episode of Detective Conan

Don't get drunk and then brag about how you killed someone to a person who joined your office/organization/etc. after the killing. They are almost certainly the dead person's lover, set on revenge.

Winging my way south

I've been here in Kentucky since December 23. Sean drove home on the 27th, and today I'm flying home. I'm looking forward to flying; it's been awhile.

It's been a great visit. I wish I could figure out some way to move back to Kentucky.

I read something last night that reminded me there are plenty of things I can do to attain the things I want. I just have to do them. Trouble is, they're scary and demanding things. I can't just wing it, and I can't just sit around and wait.

I have to decide if I really want the things I want badly enough to throw conventionality out the window.

There'll be plenty of time for contemplation on the plane, at any rate.

I should get home tonight around 9, and then tomorrow it's back to the grind :)

That didn't seem very...professional?

So I just watched the Saddam execution. Video problems aside (it was taken from a cell phone camera), I wasn't sure what to think of the whole thing. It was a dark room and there seemed to be a bunch of people in there, all taking pictures and yelling. It felt more like a lynching than a state-mandated execution.

Also, isn't the knot supposed to be in the back? Or have the movies lied to me?

Photos

So the other day I went to the family farm with Dad, Grandma, and Uncle Steve, and...I took pictures!

This is my grandmother's high school diploma. Is that awesome or what?

And check out this panorama I pieced together in Photoshop. It ain't great, but it's interesting!

2006

I've been thinking about what I've accomplished in the past 365 days for a few weeks now, and the list seems rather small.

One big thing is getting a job that has been amazingly perfect for me. It was sheer luck; I happened to see the job opening, so I applied and got it. Initially I didn't know what the job would really entail. I wasn't sure I would like it, but I figured I could do it for awhile, and try to figure out what I did want to do in the meantime.

Over time I have taken ownership of the position and used my role to expand and improve the station's website. I work with sales and promotions as well as news. I've learned so much about the television industry, and I've expanded my knowledge of what's possible on the web. And there's still so much to learn.

But working full time for the first time in years has really changed other aspects of my life. I get up in time to get ready for work, and I get home at night tired and unwilling to cook. I just watch anime or DVDs all night and then go to bed. In recent months I've even stopped packing my lunches, going out for fast food instead.

I was so much more active in 2005, before the fire. I went biking often. I think I only took my bike to the Canal once in 2006, and other than that I rode my bike twice around my neighborhood--once down to the Y, and once just back in the neighborhoods. Both times I ended up entirely too winded.

So I've deteriorated physically, and I haven't really done anything else, either. I haven't done more to improve my knowledge of Japanese. I haven't read hardly anything. Pretty much all the learning I've done has been in the course of my job. I haven't gone exploring--I've been wanting to see the dam, and Mystery Photo Guy has turned me on to another place to check out, but it seems all I do on the weekend is sit around. I've fallen into a rut; I do only what I need to do, and nothing more.

And it's driving me crazy.

I think part of this has just been recovery time from the fire. I dealt with it and moved on, in general--I was able to function. But was I really living?

There were so many things I planned to do and then backed out of. Baking Christmas cookies. Going to Wes' church for a Halloween mystery dinner. Having a party. And I still haven't bought the lining Brooke needs to make the curtains she said she'd make for Sean and my bedroom.

Some of these can be attributed to procrastination and laziness, but I feel like there's something more. Even when I feel totally motivated to accomplish something, I ultimately don't do it.

I wonder: was I afraid to live, in 2006?

Ever since the fire, I have wondered what it taught me. I wondered if I was supposed to learn not to be so attached to material possessions. I wondered if I was supposed to give up on my obsessive-compulsive self-archiving.

Have I spent my time wondering this, in lieu of doing anything else?

Do I analyze myself too much? Was the lesson really to just get over it and live?

I feel like I've been trying to learn that one for years.

Ultimately, there are some things I want, and I didn't make any progress on any of it in 2006.

I want to lose weight. But in 2006, I gained it.

I want to learn Japanese. But in 2006, I didn't even crack a book. My "studying" consisted of occasionally trying to read katakana on websites, and watching anime.

I want to play the piano again. But in 2006, I didn't even try to figure out how to get back into it.

I want to join a choir or chorus. But in 2006, I didn't look for one.

I want to be more sociable. But in 2006, I avoided social occasions and really only spent time with Brooke--essentially clinging unfairly to someone who will be moving soon.

I want to cook dinner and pack lunches. But in 2006, I ate out for the majority of my meals.

I want to write blog posts--and hell, maybe even other things--that are interesting for people to read. But in 2006, every time I thought of writing something, I just felt tired...so usually I didn't even bother to try.

In fact, pretty much everything in 2006 made me feel tired.

I remember being so happy when 2005 ended. I was so excited to leave the year of the fire behind me. But what did I do with the new year? Nothing.

"Why don't you want anymore?" AJ asked. "Straight up. Is it because you just don't like it, or are you afraid of what might happen?"

"I'm not afraid of anything happening," I said. "I just don't see the point."

"Fair enough," AJ said.

"There really isn't a point," Dan added.

Later, AJ said, "I really wonder what you'd be like drunk."

"I know, you really want to know," I said.

"It's because you're different--not in a bad way, but just different--normally. So what would you be like when you're not normal?"

"Probably depressed," I said.

"Depressed? Why? Do you feel depressed right now?"

"Yeah."

"...okay, yeah, you'd probably be depressed. Or pissed."

Happy New Year.