It's official after my echo cardiogram this afternoon. Where a normal heart pumps about 55% of the blood out of the ventricle at a time, mine is doing somewhere around 15% to 20%. This explains the freakish swelling in my legs and my overwhelming fatigue.
This could be an extremely delayed reaction to chemotherapy. It could have also been caused by the gastroenteritis I had awhile back, since viral infections are known to decrease heart function. My doctor, an intelligent, well-spoken woman we'll call Dr. G, says we'll never know.
Treatment is drugs. Dr. G says she doesn't think a biopsy is necessary, but she doubled the heart medicines my GP put me on and is adding a third starting next week after she sees me again.
I am still able to work and go about my life, but I have to refrain from strenuous activity, heavy lifting, etc.
If all goes well, my heart will start to heal in a few months.
If all doesn't go well, who knows what might happen. My mom is understandably upset because something similar happened to her sister Carol: she had a viral infection that led to decreased heart function. In her case, the drugs didn't work, and she ended up having a heart transplant.
(Aunt Carol is doing fine, although she seems to have circulation problems in her legs if she sits for too long. Aunt Carol is also a lot older than me.)
I, being young and naive, am not particularly worried about recovering from this, but I am extremely pissed off at my life right now. Okay, so, first, we lose everything we own in an apartment fire--lifelong memories that are, frankly, irreplaceable. Then, the best friend I made in Augusta moves to a completely different country. Meanwhile, my large family who I love and desperately want to spend time with all live eight hours away. I finally start to think I can deal with being infertile, only to stupidly take a home pregnancy test...that turns out to be a false positive. The worst day of my life. And then I go in today and have a completely different kind of ultrasound and find out I can't even take care of myself anymore. I can't do big-time grocery shopping. I can't assemble or move furniture. I can't go wherever I want whenever I want. No biking, no long walks, nothing, because I'm physically incapable of doing it. And it's not going to be fixed anytime soon.
So here I am trapped away from family and friends unable to take care of myself, but still well enough to work, so I have to drag myself out of bed every day and try not to pass out for eight hours so I don't lose my job.
This is not the kind of existence I was hoping for when I moved here.
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3 comments:
Well this just SUCKS. Here you were trying to be so good with the exercise and focusing on taking care of yourself for the past few months and then BLAMMO, heart problems? How unfair is that? I really hope you start feeling better soon. Rest up and all of that. I know how it feels to be so far from family when you are that sick, and all you want is the reassurance that they are nearby... because sometimes you just really need a hug from your mom. You are lucky it was caught so early, since you're not the typical heart patient, but I'm sure you're feeling anything but lucky right now. I'm thinking of you.
Heather, so sorry to hear the bad news. I hope the medicine they put you on improves your condition quickly and that you can get back to doing all the physical activities you enjoy soon. But, as Another Heather mentioned, it's good they caught it early. *HUGS* and best wishes.
Jeez... I'm sorry to hear about this, Heather. I don't know what to say... its not fair strikes me as the first reaction. I hope treatment clears all this up. I'm sorry bad stuff like this seems to keep happening to you.
Take care.
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